Are you living your life working hard not to make any mistakes?
Does that statement above bother you?
It bothered me even though I know that making mistakes is the only way to learn.
Think about it, there is virtually nothing that you learned to do well that you didn’t screw up at least a couple of times before you mastered it. For example, bicycle riding…how many times did you fall before you mastered it?
When did we become afraid of making mistakes?
When did we even learn the word mistake? One definition of mistake is an error in action, calculation, opinion, or judgment caused by poor reasoning, carelessness, insufficient knowledge, etc.
When you answered a question incorrectly in class or on a test, you were punished with that big red “X”.
I remember that “X”, and it did not feel good. It made me study to avoid the “X”. Honestly, I did well in school without much effort. This did not serve me well in college, but that’s another story…
Eventually, I got it together and made it through medical school, all the while really afraid to make a mistake or an error in judgment. This continued through residency and in practice.
But, guess what? Doctors make mistakes.
Good judgment comes from making mistakes.
It is human nature to make mistakes. Sometimes, in medicine, they are called complications, but they always feel like mistakes, even when there was nothing we could have done differently. And it is with those mistakes that we learn the most, which made us good doctors.
When I talk to a patient and explain the risks of surgery, they often want to know how many complications I have actually experienced. I have experienced quite a few because I’ve been practicing for over 25 years. I then say to them, if you talk to a doctor who has not had complications, they have not been in practice long and will not know how to handle a complication when it happens.
Mistakes can be devastating emotionally.
This is likely what causes us to avoid them. Mistakes feel bad every time, and I believe we work hard to avoid that bad feeling. What if we looked at it as something different, a learning experience, a way to be better at whatever we were trying? It may feel less bad, and it could feel like another step along the way to greatness.
Think about why you haven’t achieved the wealth you want, started working on another stream of income, or accomplished the things you have dreamed of.
The big things. The things that make you really scared when you think about them.
Remember what Steven Pressfield said about fear in The War of Art: “Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator. Fear tells us what we have to do. Remember our rule of thumb: The more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it.”
If you haven’t read his book, I highly recommend it. It is short and an easy read, filled with the stuff that lets you know that you can do better. He reminds us that we have the power to get what we want.
Time to be the bad-ass queen that you are. Take that step towards what you want. Failure will lead to greatness… when you fail, you will get up, dust yourself off, and appreciate how far you have come.
Keeping going. You’ve got this. Take a friend or two along so that you can laugh and learn together. Nothing like a friend to help you up, dust you off, cry and laugh with you.
It’s life.
I would love to know what you think. Let me know how I can help. Download 7 Steps to Building Resilient Wealth. Start your journey today, and you’ll even learn how to find your tribe in step 6.
Here’s to many mistakes with friends. Have fun!! I would love to be a witness to your greatness…schedule a free call, and let’s chat!